question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize