We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize