Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
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