Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
