I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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