fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
