he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Randomize
