Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
