Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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