Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
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