I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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