awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
Randomize
