he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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