Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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