just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I wish i was in the wii world.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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