I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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