just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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