The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Randomize
