I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
