hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
