What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
no you cant smoke seaweed
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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