Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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