my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Randomize