Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
my dad wants uyo to call him right now...reverse drunk dialing
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
