I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
