I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
