it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
