i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
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