everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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