At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Randomize
