the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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