David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
