SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
3 2 1 whiskey
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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