everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
He felt like a one man threesome
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
