He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
