STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I came so hard my ears popped.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
