she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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