you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I have tasted many bathrooms
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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