Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
