I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
