How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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