Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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