my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
Randomize
