I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
I party with great urgency now.
Randomize
