Dual....:-)
The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize
