That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Just beat 2 Norwegian women in beer pong. Never been so proud to be an American.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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