Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
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