The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Note to self: when drunk try to remember that ctrl, alt and dance doesnt exist on a keyboard.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Randomize
