Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
