HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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