We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
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