i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Tornado booty call.. dedication
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
