i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize